most annoying quotes from my CI

There is officially only one more day left at my clinical. I have to say that although it has gone by fast, and I know I am going to miss it, I am actually glad this one will soon be over. It seems like my CI has been super nit-picky this week, but that might also be because I have been itching for Friday and to get this show on the road already. However, just to give you a taste of how this has gone, I will give you a list of a few of the most ridiculous comments I have heard my CI say this week.

- To a few of the patients on my caseload - "Get ready, because this is the end of your easy sessions. You're not gonna be on vacation anymore. This is Maren's last week, so next week you are going to be seeing me. Get ready to do some real work."

- "I just got done failing you." - after filling out the clinical performance instrument (CPI) for me that we both have to fill out at midterm and final.

- He suggested some self-help books and audio tapes for me that he thinks are really motivating. I said I would check my local library for them, but I doubt they have them so I might have to do the inter-library loan for them. My CI says, "Waterville library has them." I say, "I'm not sure I want to drive all the way to Waterville. It's out of the way for me now." My CI goes on a tyrade, "Well I guess I just wasted my time suggesting these books to you! That right there tells me that you're not serious and you are not interested, so I will just back off. If you're not willing to drive to Waterville for this information, I guess it's not that important to you is it?" About 30 minutes later he says......"Yeah I just go to Owens library to get these physical therapy books. I hate driving all the way to the MCO campus. It takes forever to get there."

- "I only wrote these comments on your CPI because I know that's what Amy wants to hear. That's not how I really feel, but she's kinda weird, so I just wrote what she would like to read."

- Wednesday, he had me see a patient that was on HIS caseload. They had been doing advanced core exercises, so I started working with the patient on the same advanced core exercises to see if he had mastered them. My CI comes running out screaming, "NO! NO! NO! He is NOT ready for those yet! See how he is shaking! He can't even do it! Have him do the basic core exercises that we give to everyone." So I start the patient with the basic core exercises (which include abdominal crunches). My CI comes running over and says, "NO! He is NOT ready for abdominal crunches! Have him do all of the core exercises except for those!"

- Today we had a Christmas pot luck with the people who work at the Occupational Health Dr's office next to us. I busted my butt last night making pasta salad for it when I really just wanted to go to bed and forget about it. We had a patient today from 11:45 - 12:30, but the people from the Dr's office started getting the food out at noon. They asked me why I wasn't coming in and I said, "because I have a patient." The nurse replied, "Well Mike said that you didn't have any patients until 12:30 so that's why we're starting now. Sorry about that!" I stayed in the gym, saw my patient while my CI gobbled down the food at the pot luck with everyone else. He came in at the end of the treatment and says, "All the food is gone." I finish seeing my patient and go in the little kitchen area to eat bits of leftovers all by myself. What a fun pot luck.

- In front of a patient, my CI says, "I was willing to sacrifice my body for you to be able to palpate the scalenes (neck muscles), but you never asked, so I guess you really don't care. You are going to wish you had asked me."

- "When I offer to let you practice on me, you act like you just want to rush right through it. I guess that means you really don't care about manual therapy." To this, I wanted to scream - WELL, that's because you make me palpate your PSIS and ischial tuberosities while you unbuckle your belt! Who wouldn't want to rush through that and forget about it. It's one thing if it's a patient, it's a whole other thing when it's your CI and the medical secretary walks in wondering what the heck is going on.

-"This book changed my life. I base all of my treatment sessions around this book. It's amazing." Really? Because I've never seen, heard of, or read this book in my entire life, but you want me to read your mind and be able to treat all the patients like I have seen this book before.

-"There is no such thing as a complex patient." When I asked him if it was ok to do soft tissue massage over a skin graft for a patient who had an overuse injury to her arm.

-"She (me) doesn't care. She's leaving after this week anyway." to several patients.